oh....

Will we ever know what is to be? Will there ever be a "oh, okay, this is it, this is what i'm supposed to do, this is who i'm supposed to be with?" Does life ever make sense? or do we just live life hoping and praying that we don't get fucked over to bad and thats the best there is? This is very pessimistic I know. And in all fairness my life is pretty damn good, it just seems that the things that i really want in life, i never get....and that just sucks. I really want to believe that good things come to those who wait, but how long do you have to wait.....Okay, i'm done with this : )

I get to play around with a fake moog tonight...this is exciting...i also got a computer program where i can program some drum beats. This will also be fun...i think it could take me a while to figure out how to get it to works though : ) I was thinking last night of all the fun music stuff i need. I need a small mixing board..i need an eight track...i need a bass pod...i need at least one amp, but probably two...i need an i-pod (hint, hint) : )...eventually i'm going to need a laptop and a better drum program (although, i haven't used this one yet, i've been told i will need a better one)...i need a new keyboard...so i probably won't get all of this but it is okay to dream... : )